Blog – This is not a goodbye post (except it is, sort of…)

After a run of posts covering everything from job uncertainty, to inclusion, to why I think life modelling is helpful for confidence, this will be my last blog for Dementia Researcher. It’s not a dramatic goodbye, rather just a natural end as I move into a new role. Before I go, I wanted to reflect (briefly) on a couple of things: leaving this space, and where I am headed.

Writing for Dementia Researcher has been a rare kind of outlet, one where I could step slightly outside of formal academic writing and talk a bit more openly about how it feels to do this work, and about the things related to dementia research that don’t already have enough of a spotlight upon them.  Over the past couple of years, this blog has been a fantastic place to explore language, power, precarity, and all the awkward, quiet negotiations that happen in dementia research but don’t always make it into papers or presentations.

It’s strange to end something that never had a set schedule or clear endpoint, but it does feel like the right moment to pause. Not because I’ve run out of things to say (as if!), but because I want to make space for others to say what they need to. There are so many researchers who are navigating the same uncertainties and tensions that I’ve shared here, and Dementia Researcher has always been generous in platforming that range of voices. It’s something the platform does especially well, and one of the reasons I’ve valued being part of it.

As some of you will know from previous posts, the job search was a tough and sometimes demoralising process. I’m grateful for the support I had throughout and relieved to have found a new role that feels like the right fit. It has been a difficult journey, and one I think we should be more open about, because the realities of academic precarity are still too often left unspoken.

I was essentially in the job market for over a year, and although I managed to obtain short-term grants that ensured I wasn’t without income, the uncertainty lingered far longer that my anxieties could tolerate. There’s a particular kind of emotional toll that comes with repeatedly applying, waiting, second-guessing, and trying to sound confident about a future that feels anything but secure. It’s exhausting, not just logistically, but existentially.

I know that many others are navigating the same landscape. Although I don’t have a tidy narrative of triumph to offer, I do think there’s value in being honest about what this process looks and feels like, especially when so much of it happens behind closed doors. That honesty is, I think, part of how we change the culture.

If you’re in the thick of it just now, you’re definitely not alone, and feeling frustrated doesn’t mean you’re failing.

Sometimes, it just means that the system maybe needs fixing. And yeah, it can be easy to start feeling like a walking CV during all of this, but you’re not. You’re a whole person, with a mix of skills and qualities that no single application can ever fully show and getting rejected doesn’t take away any of that (honestly, I wish someone had told me that whilst I was still looking!).

So where am I going, if not here?

I am moving into a new role as a Research Excellence Framework (REF) Officer at my university. This position shifts me sideways slightly, from direct research into a supportive role. I’m thrilled to have secured this role as it’s a change that I have been aiming towards for some time, and I am excited about the new perspectives and challenges it will bring. The role gives me space to keep engaging with issues I care most about, namely research quality and culture, but from a different vantage point. I still feel very connected with the field of dementia research, but I’m also looking forward to being part of a different facet of the research landscape.

I won’t be blogging for Dementia Researcher again (although I wouldn’t rule out a cameo on a Christmas podcast…), but I am incredibly grateful for what this platform has allowed me to do. To speak openly, to name the things that don’t always get said, and to feel like a welcomed part of a wider, generous community of researchers.

Thank you for reading, for thinking alongside me (and challenging me!), and for allowing these blog posts to be a space where the messy, human parts of research could live. Don’t be strangers!

Jodi Watt

Author

Dr Jodi Watt is a Postdoctoral Researcher at University of Glasgow. Jodi’s academic interests are in both healthy ageing and neurodegenerative diseases of older age, and they are currently working on drug repurposing for dementia. Previously they worked on understanding structural, metabolic and physiological brain changes with age, as measured using magnetic resonance imaging. As a queer and neurodiverse person, Jodi is also incredibly interested in improving diversity and inclusion practices both within and outside of the academic context.

Find Jodi on LinkedIn